Julie Lee10 years ago

We have a no electronics during meals at home. We’ll permit electronics after the meal when dining out so that our child can keep himself busy while we take time to eat. There are great program out there that help kids learn (like the Endless Alphabets or block.ly) so I’m all for it.

Brisja11 years ago

There is no right answer to this question. We feel that waiting is an important skill to cultivate, and have been working on it since day one with our son. We do not take a goodie bag to restaurants, nor do we allow electronics at the table. As a result, our now eleven year old can sit and enjoy the people at the table with him, notice the decor, have discussions about the past, present and future to entertain himself and the others with him, and just take a moment to do nothing but “be” and relax. I know this might not work for all families or all children within a family, but it worked for us. And we have spent a lot of quality time around the table as a family, and with our friends. That is time we will never get back, so I am glad we spent it engaged, together.

Gretta11 years ago

I can totally relate to your confusion! My kids are 3.5 and 1.5 and go out to dinner is no picnic. That said, I feel like I’d like to be the kind of parent who does NOT allow games or videos at the table. Every time I look around in a restaurant and see everyone on their phones in stead of interacting it totally depresses me. For me, it’s a matter of thinking long term gain (for the kids) instead of short term gain(for me). What do I want my kids to learn from me? How do I want them to behave and interact? I don’t want to have kids who are glued to devices when they are in social situations. The thing is, that also means that I AND MY HUSBAND can not be on our devices in these situations either, cause as we all know, in the end the kids learn mostly by our example. Now, all this said, I have to admit that 4 days out of every week my husband and I eat our dinner in front of the TV (only “good” programming of course!), so maybe my feelings on this issue all come down to “do as i say, not as i do”. I think in the end, I just want my kids to be better than i am.

Abbie11 years ago

I love the long term vs short term debate. And I subscribe to your philosophy too, for the most part. For every dinner at home, we eat at the table as a family without any electronics. When we go out as a family we don’t normally use our iPhones to keep the kids in their seats. And, again, it isn’t the first thing we reach for. But every once in a while when we are exhausted and just want a break, it’s a treat for all of us, for about 15 minutes. I debate the merits – and then get annoyed that I have to debate it at all. Why does it have to be “all or nothing”?

Sabrina schiller11 years ago

What a womderful exploration of a modern parent’s dilema regarding children in the electronic era! Your articles constantly amaze me. Always interesting, always different, always extremely relevant to the real problems parents face. I know this will help others who are pioneering decisions like yours.

Abbie11 years ago

Thanks, mom. 😉

Liza11 years ago

We have the same conflicting emotions about electronics at the dinner table! Combined with my husband’s blackberry and iphone for work PLUS his personal phone, he was becoming the worst offender and not helping the “no electronics at the dinner table” rule. Our compromise was electronics away when the food arrives at the table which applied for all of us. Another way we make sure the kids are unplugged is our Summer camping trip where there’s no internet access for anyone.

Abbie11 years ago

Love it. At home we have a “no tech at the table” rule – but ugh the restaurant waiting and squirming and having to be quiet. I’m clearly still conflicted.